Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Still fighting the good fight

In case you were wondering,  (And I know you were) I’m still out here. I’ve ben neglecting my blog as of late. The funny thing about that is, I feel like I have a million things to say. Somehow when I sit down here to write them though, my fingers don’t move and my churning thoughts come to rest.

Its almost Halloween! I should be brimming with Zombie humor and insight. But as it turns out lately I am very emotional and struggling each day to get by. There isn’t a major catastrophe going on or anything, but sometimes life just comes at you hard and fast.

I’m still looking for work. Our unemployment has run out and as it happens, the bills are piling up. I do have a pretty good shot at this one place though. More details on that when I have them. Hubby DID manage to get a job… but it’s far from the amount of hours we need right now. He works 1 day this week. I’m hoping that will get better as the season goes on.

We had plans to move this January. We’re really extremely excited about the move. We love the place we are trying to move to, and it’s ten minutes from the beach. I am so excited about this I don’t even know if I have the words. But, the money just isn’t going to be there. We are very hopeful that the classes hubby is attending right now will lead to work, but if they do, that means not moving until June. Well even if they don’t it means not moving until June anyway because of lack of funds.

My poor puppy has been in and out of the vet this past month with various things wrong. No worries though, all her skin is intact and she doesn’t smell like a rotting tomato or anything. She hasn’t succumbed to the zombie plague.

So, that’s just a little background on what my life looks like right now.

The good news is that I seem to have managed to break the ‘gain a week, lose a week, gain a week’ cycle I was on. I’ve not lost three weeks in a row. They are small losses but I will take them. I’m excited to be able to report that the 22 pants I was so excited to fit into, are becoming lose. I can slide them down without unbuttoning them. Smile I’m getting close to that prize dress I have hanging on the back of my bedroom door.

Eating is being a problem this week. I dropped down to 34 points. I think I am subconsciously rebelling against this number or something. For some reason it is so much harder to stay below than 35 was. And I’m not going over by just 1 point either. So I need to figure out what my issue with that is. I really think I am just dealing with a lot of things mentally right now and I am somehow acting out against myself.

So I don’t have great triumphant things to write about right now. But maybe if I share what I am going through, I’ll be able to touch someone else going through the same thing. Sometimes knowing you aren’t alone is really half the battle. Remember when avoiding the zombies and surviving the horde, have a buddy. Watch each other’s back.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Up and Down

Hi there. It’s been a little while since I’ve updated the Zombie blog here. Sorry about that. It isn’t that I haven’t wanted to write, but sometimes I lack inspiration. I don’t always have exciting zombie filled action to talk about.

Lately things have been a little rocks. I’m still losing, so that is really good. It’s been an up and down battle for a month or so now though. I’ll lose a little, and then the following week gain, and then take a week or two to lose more, and then gain… etc. I’ve been trying to watch my eating habits and how my activity points are adding up.

My activity definitely goes in an up and down pattern also. So that is part of it right there. Also, my eating fluctuates based on when in the month it is. At the beginning of the month we have food stamps, so we can go and do a big shopping trip and stock up on fresh healthy wonderful things. By the end of the month, things are tight and we’re eating less healthy and more possessed.

We’ve had the house to ourselves for most of this week though, so up until last night eating has gone really well. I’ve been enjoying mostly soup and salad for dinner and it has been making my tummy sing! Last night however, I got hit with the urge for hot dogs. Oh heavens the hot dogs.

Zombies are almost as attracted to hot dogs as they are to corn dogs. Our street has been zombie clear for a little while now, but last night I could see them coming. They could smell those hot dogs, man. They could tell I was getting fatter just sitting there. There was one trying to get on the porch and he had a chefs hat on. I hid the relish… I don’t want to give them ideas.

So, today it is back on track to try and have a good sowing for my weigh in on Monday. Some days I feel so confident about everything. Some days, not so much. It’s also very apparent, that eating is so linked to my emotional states. I mean, I know this. I think most of us do. I have however been able to watch the cycles lately though. This is a really stressful time right now. There are –things- happening in the background which I’ll bring to the foreground once I am a little bit more sure of them. These things however have me under a lot of stress. Stress makes me craze sweet things, it also makes me rebel in a strange way against doing things that are good for me.

I don’t understand why this happens, but at least I can watch for it. There are some hard decisions being made right now, and sometimes when that happens, I just want a hot dog. Or as the case may be lately… chocolate or a cookie. I just need to find that strength to reach inside and say… Okay, girl… I know. But come now, you know you want –THIS- more.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Updates

Updates are coming soon, I promise. It's just been kind of crazy around here. This is just a quick post to show off a special badge that was awarded to me for my progress. Thanks SL!