Love

It’s motivational Monday here on the zombie blog. I feel as if I have a whole host of things to talk about today. We shall see how much of it manifests into writing.

First of all, I want to talk about a quote I found.

“The greatest weakness of most humans is their hesitancy to tell others how much they love them while they're alive.”
— O.A. Battista

I am not even exactly sure why this struck me as deeply as it does. I think maybe because sometimes I struggle with telling people that I love them. Well no, that isn’t really true. There are only some people I struggle to tell how much I love them. My parents are some of those people. I don’t tell them enough how much they mean to me. I am going to add that to my list of self improvements to make.

But this is about motivation. So, one of the people whom I happen to love very much is a woman whose life parallels my own in many ways. She struggles with many of the same issues I do too. We recently took note of how our lives progress down similar paths and of the struggles we have over come so far. She has been one of the people who has been travelling with me on my journey from the beginning.

So my dear S. over at MissAdventures…Thank you for always being there and being supportive. Thank you for getting me excited about my life when I really am not all that enthusiastic about it. Thank you for giving me a place to hide form the zombies for a while. I love you!

I also want to take a moment to say thank you to R. I’ve known her since high school and she has been a tremendous inspiration to me on this trip. She never fails to reach out to me with advice or encouragement and it’s in part thank to her and her fabulous blog (I go through life…), that I started blogging myself. She advised me to invite my zombies to tea, and taking a good hard look at them was very helpful to me. She also was instrumental in my getting my body bugg which is an invaluable too. Thank you R. I love you!

Motivation!!! So, I joined weight watchers online today. I can’t express how exciting this is. It’s like an entire contingent of people on anti zombie brigade! (I’m not sure they know this) I am actually excited about tracking food again! For the love of all that is good (including anti zombie-ists), I am excited about food tracking again. If that isn’t motivational, I don’t know what is.

Do not become a zombie burger. If you are close to this state… there is still hope! If you haven’t actually started munching brains yet that is. I’ve gotten close. But I am still outrunning them.

I am also planning on renewing my body bugg today. I need it. It keeps me honest. It also makes me feel awesome when I beat the calories burned form the day before, or the week before. Reminders of doing well… or even when you’re slipping back are awesome. I’ve put weight on since not having it. A Lot.

So today is a good day. I’m thankful, I’m motivated and apparently I am also verbose. So there you have it!

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Blog Hop! Drab2Fab

Motivation

Freebie Friday here on the Zombieblog!

“How soon 'not now' becomes 'never'.” – Martin Luther

“Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.” – Mark Victor Hansen

Today I was struck with a sudden burst of enthusiasm and motivation. I actually began to get things done around the house. I wasn’t suddenly cleaning and organizing because I had to, but because I wanted to.

I wish I could harness that feeling. It left me all to soon. I got distracted trying to solve and organizational problem. In our super tiny living room, we need a better solution for how to store the TV, game systems, DVD’s, games, remotes and controllers. There is quite a lot of equipment to store in a small space. I wasn’t happy with the solutions we had available, mainly moving the dvd shelves (which I don’t really like in the first place) under the tv. We’re actually losing DVD storage space. This is being done so that (hopefully) my computer and chair will fit in there. It’s all so frustrating.

I browsed craigslist for a while hoping the perfect entertainment center would be there. When it wasn’t I started browsing dressers as I very likely could make a long dresser work if the drawers were the proper shape. I got frustrated though. And then I got distracted again…

By now I am sure you have figured out I have completely lost my focus and my drive. I now have a bunch of cleaning in the partially done state and I am frustrated that I haven’t gotten anything finished. (I also have a gnat flying around my face I keep missing that is driving me slightly insane)

Its funny how my struggles with weight loss follow almost these exact pattern lines. I get excited and motivated and start doing it all. Then something comes along to distract me. Sometimes it’s a zombie with an awesome naughty food treat trying to slow me down so they can chomp my brains. Sometimes it is that I am so enamored with the plan I have for losing the weight that I spend so much time massaging it and tweaking it and not enough time actually enacting it that I lose momentum. I love having a plan. In fact I really don’t function without one. So why is that I am so disorganized that I can’t seem to keep myself on track with anything.

So now I need to try and pull myself back together. I need to go hang the laundry out and for heavens sake put the laundry away that is already folded. Then there are things I really want to get done, but I won’t be comfortable working on them until everything is clean. I’m a bit anal like that. So I want to work on the blanket I am designing. I want to crochet more of my flower motifs. I want to practice making a Dorset button. I want to sketch a bit more before the necklace ideas leave my brain. But all of there things require me to be able to get into the creative mindset and sort of court my muse. My muse does not like clutter. She doesn’t like mess. She doesn’t like things screwing with the energy flow if she is around. I know how to please her. I just don’t like doing the chores.

Now… if my inner goddess would come out and tell me so precisely what she needs to be happy so I could really get the weight loss journey going, that would be really nice. I might not want to do the chores either, but at least then I would know how to placate her. She will NOT be pleased if I end up as some undead boogers brain burger.

Motivational Monday

George Bernard Shaw
You see things; and you say "Why?" But I dream things that never were; and I say "Why not?"

Ralph Marston
Your goals, minus your doubts, equal your reality.

Lee Iacocca
You've got to say, I think that if I keep working at this and want it badly enough I can have it. It's called perseverance.

This past week has been amazing. One of my best friends in the world came to visit. He was the best man at my wedding and I haven’t seen him in EIGHT years. That is so long. I didn’t even realize how long it was until he was here again.

A few thoughts that tie in… The first is that I completely didn’t track points the entire time he was here. So I derailed for the week. I want to say that I feel badly about it. I don’t though. I haven’t seen him in eight years and the week was about DOING and BEING and LOVING.

Today however, is a new day. Today I am ready to get back in the saddle. I am ready to get back to my points and walking. For the record I tried to go walking today and it was just too hot. I gave myself a wicked headache walking from the house to the end of the driveway and I hid in the shade on the way there. I deemed it unsafe to walk in that heat and came back inside.

But I am not giving up. Above, I have copied some quotes that are speaking to me today. I have never been skinny. I have never been fit. I have never known what it is like to not feel, in some way, unhappy with my body. But I dream of it. I dream about being able to look in the mirror and just smile at myself. I dream about walking through my house without bumping into things. I dream about running down shady streets lined with trees and feeling my hair bounce on my back and wind in my face. I dream of no infertility issues. I dream about buying new clothes. They are great dreams. It’s time for them to become reality. I know I can do this.

That is where the perseverance comes in. I haven’t been very good at this part. That doesn’t mean I can’t be though. These are the pep talks I give myself. Just because I haven’t managed to do it yet, doesn’t mean that I can’t do it. I’m human, and sometimes it doesn’t work and I really do feel like I can’t do it. I usually have a good cry then and try and find the answers. Today though, isn’t one of those days. I really feel good. I feel good despite all of the things going on with the house and the money. I feel good even though my heart aches a little. I guess maybe good isn’t the word for what I am feeling. I think the word might be confident.

I want to be around for many more of life’s perfect moments.

Day 16 & Blog Hop

Today's Quote..
"Patience is the key to paradise."

- Turkish proverb

I lost my patience last night. I just found myself feeling very frustrated with myself and my lack of progress. We all go through that at times though don't we? But my hubby stood me back on my feet and gave me a pretty good talking to. Everything I am trying to do, I have done before. I've lost probably all the weight I need to if you add up all the times I have started and stopped. I can do this. I have just not been making the best choices for myself. I am falling victim to the zombie in charge of instant gratification. That is the one that make you feel good at the moment by falling behind you so you think you are getting away. What you then don't notice is the whole horde of them that have taken the short cute and are about to jump you and eat your brains.

Heh.. not a good zombie to hang out with.

So I have attempted to recommit myself today. I recorded all my food even though I was sure I was going to go over in calories. I haven't. Close, but I haven't gone over. I'm going to work extra hard to make sure I get all of my water in tonight and go from there. I'ld like to be able to put a little number 1 up. It would make me feel really good.

Day 14 Dieting Scars

This quote if from an article I read entitled Dieting Scars

"

Self-love is the only weight-loss aid that really works in the long run. - Jenny Craig, diet guru

"

The article talked about the need to to honor and take care of ones body. It talked about trying to find out what is the root of eating. It is hunger? Boredom? Depression? Fear of Rejection?

I'm not going to get into all of the details of it because it didn't all resonate with me. But I do identify with the idea that this is my temple and I need to treat it properly. I have not been. I haven't really been enforcing very much self control. My best friend suggested that I really take a look at what I have been eating before I decide if stress is really to blame. Well low and behold, I am crazy stressed out and do you know what that makes me eat?

Fats and Sugars. BIG SURPRISE.

SO yeah, no wonder the weight isn't coming off. Eating too many calories and having too many of them come from fats and sugars. I realize this is going be tough. I realize that I need to work on a little bit of tough love with myself. I think it will help. I know it will help.

My zombies are always just in my rear view mirror. If I let them catch up, they will. For some reason, its always harder to pull away from them than it is to maintain momentum and distance. So I need to stop letting myself slide backwards. I absolutely know I can do this. I know I can. So do you hear me self? A little self discipline would be beneficial... it's okay. We're worth it.

Day 10

"I have always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I have to be more specific."

- Lily Tomlin, actress

Do you mean to tell me that simply stating that I want to not end up as Zombie food isn't enough? Get more specific ey?

There is a good message there. Setting goals is important. We all need things to work towards, but being specific is important too. I tend to avoid this. I somehow feel like if I am too specific with what I want, that I will automatically fail at accomplishing it. I think it's just a fear thing. As badly as I want these healthy changes, there is definitely some fear involved. I haven't quite figured out what, or exactly what I am afraid of yet either. The major one is failing.

What if I can't do this. But I'm already not doing it, so what is there to be afraid of. It can only get better.

But in this post I want to talk about goals again. In the past I have had a hard time with following through on the goals I set. I also have had a problem with setting specific goals for myself. I also have had a problem accepting that fact, that not attaining 100% everyday does not equal success. That is a big one.

So some goals for me.. specific ones....
Lose 1lb a week.
Blog 1x a day
Drink 8 8oz glasses of water a day
10 minutes of exercising (1x a day) 3x a week

I am starting with those. I know the list of goals will grow and change. As I begin to build good habits I already have the next set of goals formulating in my head. But I am so afraid of trying to do too much and make myself burn out on doing any of it. This is my year, and I need to do this for myself.

Day 9

I read this quote:

"It's bizarre that the produce manager is more important to my children's health than the pediatrician. "

- Meryl Streep, actress

It speaks volumes about the benefit of healthy eating. I also think it really points out the fact that good eating behaviors begin when we're young. I can't blame my poor health on my youth. I know that I didn't learn to eat the proper proportions. I was eating WAY TOO MUCH. But in all honesty, I don't remember WHAT I was eating.

I know that now I eat a much larger variety of food. While some of it is worse nutritionally, I'm sure that what I used to eat, most of it is probably much much better. I've introduced a whole host of new vegetables and how to prepare them to my parents. I've also come to understand the importance of whole grains and protein. Why then, am I the heaviest I have been in my life? (Well close to it anyway)

Because I am lazy. I don't like to get up and move. I lead a pretty sedentary lifestyle. Now here is the bizarre part to this. When I am up and moving and going to the Y consistently and walking the track (3 miles every couple of days) I feel great.

I lack consistency I think.

I'll work on that.

The zombies are very good at being consistent.... ::shhuuuuuffffflllllleeeee:: Braaaaaaiinnnnns...