Friday, May 14, 2010

Kneecaps?

I lost four pounds this week by shooting the kneecaps off of vampires!

Do I have your attention? Good. No, no, it's not true. I haven't lost any weight yet, and I have not engaged in kneecap busting drama with the blood sucking undead. Not YET!

In fact, at this point in time, I have a very long way to go. My starting weight is almost 278lbs. For a chick of not even five feet, this is pretty outrageous! On a grand scale of outrunning the zombie horde I rank somewhere around...

:shuffle shuffle: Brrrraaaaiiiiiiinnnnnnnsssssssssssss....... :shuffle shuffle:

But that's alright. Because I have learned the first step in outrunning the horde is to avoid corn-dogs! I have this on good authority as zombies are attracted to corn-dogs. As I have no intention of becoming a zombie, or staying a fat chick, I think avoiding corn-dogs is a good first move.

So, to keep myself motivated, I thought I would chronicle my adventures here. Lets face it, I would rather jump over here and write about how the exercise and eating adventure is going then say... hop on a treadmill with a crazed cannibal behind me. I mean seriously... I like when my butt is stared at, but I would prefer the guy not be thinking... "Wow! That would go good with cheese..."

So I am sure this isn't all going to be fun and games, but Darn it, most of it should be. I don't subscribe to the whole... 'getting healthy should be hard and make you miserable' school of thought. I mean if that is the case, why would anyone do it? I wonder these things.

Anyway, this is my intro post to the dashing and daring quest to fight fat cells, sweat a lot and conquer the things that go bump in the night.... or in this case...

:shuffle shuffle: Brrrraaaaiiiiiiinnnnnnnsssssssssssss....... :shuffle shuffle:

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